From Fancy w/ Love: I’m Not Obligated to Make Sense

Young Curly-Haired Woman --- Image by © Jon Feingersh/zefa/Corbis

Young Curly-Haired Woman --- Image by © Jon Feingersh/zefa/Corbis

Because I usually tend to write from personal experiences and in first person, I have battled between wanting to write about a variety of subjects and the need to explain myself and actions. I felt like I could  not move on until I addressed the issues, yet, I did not feel that everyone was owed an explanation.

My personal brand has been built on my authenticity. The majority of those who know and support me, usually do so because they know they are able to view this, but what about those who are just there to watch and judge. I questioned why I should have to share my business with them. They would not understand- hell they did not even care, but there I was feeling like I owed them something.

Looking back, I realized I have always felt obligated to make sense to people, because to not make sense seems to say, you are incompetent and/or you will not be successful. I was not making sense to others, yet given my circumstances, my actions were understandable. I silently went back and forth with the issue, each time honing in more and more on the fact that I have experienced everything alone.

Then it hit me, I am not obligated to make sense to anyone. Each day we say it’s 2016/2015- and it really is. Nothing makes much sense anymore. Yet in this day and time, whereas we speak so often on loving ourselves, it seems like we should be more open to things and people not making sense, because it is a part of our individualism. However, on the other hand, if others are not accepting, then once again it’s 2016, why should we care. Why should we allow the judgement of others to have that type of control over our lives, when we know all of our actions are usually a reflection of all that’s been input in us? 

Are we really loving ourselves and being true to ourselves when we seek the approval of others? No, because that means they have to like it or accept it before you do, so you are not doing anything for yourself, but for others. People love to talk about what they would do, but in actuality when push comes to shove, only once faced with the situation do we really know what we would do.  We are not obligated to make sense to other people. Do what make sense to you. 

 

From Fancy w/ Love

me in yellow headshot

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