I heard people say growing up how they wish they could spend every waking moment with their child. How wonderful it was to wake up in the morning and be able to stay home. My mom didn’t do it but I saw how stressed out she was often and how beat she always seemed to be.
It was at a young age that I realized I wanted to be a stay at home mom. I missed my mom sometimes and wish she’d spent more time with me, teaching me things only she could teach me. I began to dream about being married with children. Oh how wonderful it would be!
As I got older I found myself more interested in the corporate world. What I seen portrayed on television was amazing. Juggling work and home life with independence and freedom, how exhilarating! Needless to say I was a very confused young adult.
Fast forward to now when I have two businesses and 8 children with one on the way. I am, I suppose, what you would call a stay at home mom because besides any meetings or events I work on my own time and am home most of the time. I am able to run life like a well tuned machine. With schedules and order. And looking back at my earlier years and first decision to be a stay at home mom, my first thought is WHAT WAS I THINKING?! I love my children and I assure you I will move heaven and earth treading upon any dangers coming their way in the midst but sheesh! How do people do this every single day of their life. I am able to push through days with a smile on my face and pep in my step still managing to encourage everyone around me but great day in the morning who would choose to do this?
It is a great idea for those who have miles and piles of patience, but me? I’m still working with a mustard seed. My husband swears I have much more but by 8:30 pm I clock out. Dinner eaten, house work done, children in the bed and me going off in my own little corner to relax and release the mishaps and woes of the day.
Let me reiterate that I do love my children with every fiber of my being. And I love what I do almost as much. So where do I find the balance without giving up on my responsibilities or my goals? Prayer. Perseverance. Long days and long nights.
My days start at 5 am and end as early as midnight and as late as 3 am. That’s right, I’m usually running on fumes but I guarantee you that I would not change it for the world. Some seem to think you cannot have both home and career and be happy. And though it may seem contradictory, I am happy. In the beginning I was constantly questioning myself and wondering what I had gotten myself into. I will be honest, it took a lot of searching to be sure I wanted to continue on in what seems like chaos to some. But my answer was yes. My answer will always be yes.
When you learn that nothing will be handed to you that’s when you realize its okay. It gets hard and it seems impossible but you can do it. If you want to, and ONLY if you want to.
So remember its your dream and your goal, go for it like nothing is standing in your way. Trust me at the end of the road you will be glad you did.